Europe Vacation!

Hey hey party peoples!!! So, you've probs been wondering what I've been up to all summer, what with Timmy Tim in the clink and me being unemployed (again). And since my baby tattoo parlor hasn't really been all that hoppin, I decided to cash in my savings bonds and take a vacation!!! Yeah, I been backpacking through the Europes, they are so rad ya'll! OK, here's a few pics...don't be jealous!

Here's a pic of me going to the world famous Loo!

Ha ha, just kidding ya'll. This is me going to the REAL Loo. The Loo-vruh? However you say it, here it is!

I checked out some pretty fabulous art... may I present to you, the Tori Le-sa! Ha! Awesome.

Took a romantic gondola ride in Venice...

I marched in an Oktoberfest parade in Germany... glad my tuba skills could finally be put to good use!

Ha ha! I harassed the guards at Buckingham! I bet that never gets old!!!

The queen gave me a stern talking-to afterwards though... "Impersonating a royal official... ten-thousand pound fine... blah blah blah." Ten-thousand pounds of what old lady? You're not the boss of me!!!

It could happen to you...

Ok, you guyses, scary story. So, have you ever gone swimming at the public pool, and as you're putting your suit on, standing there in the dressing room, gathering up your towel and things, you happen to catch a glimpse over your shoulder, and with HORROR realize that right behind you, among all the other little kids and old ladies changing into thier swimsuits, that in FULL GLORY right there out in the open for everyone to see...

you almost forgot your sunglasses? YIKES, huh?

TTT

Whassup my peoples? I hope you all had a merry Independence Day! I know I sure did. I decided to do a good deed and volunteer to serve lunch at the prison. I just wanted to help those who are less fortunate celebrate our freedom and stuff. I think it really lifted their spirits.

Anyhoodiddlydoo, while I was there, I gots the most BRILLIANT idea! A tattoo parlor! For babies! Yeah, that's right. "Tori's Tattoos for Tots." I mean we already pierce their ears and stuff, so why the freak not? You've probably never heard of a baby tattoo parlor before, so I think I've got a big corner on the market. I don't actually have a "parlor" per se, so I'm just doing it out of my living room for now. Here's a pic of my first happy customer:


Once the crying and swelling stops, I think he's really going to love growing into those. Ok, well, if you're interested, you knows what to do! HOLLA!!!

For Sale

Yo yo, it's Tori Tizzle in the hizzle! What's happnenin y'alls?! OK, so sad news, I recently got let go from my job at Hooties. Big. Fat. Bummers!!! :( I didn't show up sober um, at work for a few days and I guess they frown on that. Subsequently homies, I'm in need of a few dollars. So I decided to sell my prized left handed vintage air guitar. Just needs some new strings and a good dusting. So hits me up if you're interested! It's for a good cause, you know? The T to the O to the R to the EEE Needs Some Cash Cause!

I'm IT!!

OK, so I've been tagged AGAIN! This time by my awesome sister Lindsey who is so awesome that words can't even describe how undeniably AWESOME she is!!!! OK, so, 6 unimportant things about myself, CAN YOU HANDLE IT WORLD?! I don't think you can!!!!

1 - I still use a nightlight.
2 - I painted my car to look like the General Lee from Dukes of Hazzard.
3 - I recorded myself playing the entire Disney Enchanted soundtrack on the kazoo and sent it to a bunch of record executives. Still waiting to hear back...
4 - I'm really good at the kazoo
5 - Almost every type of food gives me the gassies. Seriously, like, everything. Pop Tarts, lunch meat, mac & cheese, kool-aid, you name it.
6 - I still haven't decided what I wants to be when I grow up, but I'm thinking either palm-reading,bull-fighting or Willy Wonka.

Alrighty, adios me ameegos! This is Tori-T, what it do, who it be!!

Pretty sweet, no?

She Works Hard for the MONEY!!! $$$

Yo yo yo!!! It's T-licious back atcha again! So get this homeslices: guess who is now gainfully employed, working part-time at the local Hooters? ME!!! Yeah, you heard me, I gots a job!! OK, it's not actually Hooters, it's a smaller subsidiary of Hooters, called Hooties. They're not quite as big as the regular chain, if you know what I'm saying. So come visit me at Hooties! Tuesday thru Wednesday during the lunch shift! HOLLA!!!!

DROOL!!!

Is it just me, or is this not the HOTTEST guy in the world?! Hubba Hubba!!!!!! (I still love you the most Tim!)

Back again!

Okie Dokie Artichokes,
So guess what y'all?! I've been TAGGED! That means I'm supposed to tell you about most recent five books I've read and stuff and then whoever reads this is TIZZ-AGGED and has to do the same thing! Check it, don't recollect it! Ok, here we's go:

#1 Baby Sitter's Club #19, Claudia's New Friend. Basically this is about when Claudia feels left out by the other baby sitters and makes a new friend and the other baby sitters don't really like the new friend and stuff. It's pretty deep, I didn't understand most of it. Ok...

#2 Hop on Pop, Dr. Suess. Sometimes I just like to kick it with the classics, you know what I mean? Old school style and whatnots.

#4 Does the back of a Hot Pockets box count?

And finally, #5: Phytoentomology: An Anthropologist's Discourse on Intermorphus Native Genus Auralspecies and the Risks They Face Due to Global Warming and Climate Change. Just Kidding, Y'all! It was really "The Best of Both Worlds: Miley Cyrus's Unauthorized Biography"

Later taters!!!

Hey World!

WHASSUP???!!!1 It's T to the Ori here blogging it up hardcore style for all my peeps out there in Blogtopia! Just thought I'd give you the 411 on what me and my boo Timtronics have been up to here in P-town! So check it: I'm currently unemployed, HOWEVER, I am still rockin it as president of the Hanson Fan Club, which takes up a lot of my time, you know, running the website, sending emails and drafting petitions to have our national anthem changed to "MmmBop!" Other than that I've been spending a lot of time at home though due to the restraining order the Jonas Brothers have out on me :( But whatevs! Tim is keeping busy, he just gots promoted y'alls!! He is now head dishwasher at the prison instead of cleaning the urinals! Yeah, he's serving some time, he got busted for selling stolen dinette sets on craigslist, but HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THEY WERE STOLEN?!! He told me they fell off the back of a truck. I love you Tim Incarcerated!!!1 But it's cool, you know. We will gets to be together in 3 to 5, or earlier for good behavior. Anyway, that's all for now! Check back often for more glimpses into the fabulous lives of your favorite couple, TNT!! Peace!

PS: If anyone is looking for a great deal on a sweet dinette set, gimme a holla!